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smart cats
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2001-03-31
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Four men were bragging about how smart their cats were. The first man
was an Engineer, the second man was an Accountant, the third man was a
Chemist, the fourth was a State worker. To show off, the Engineer called to
his cat, "T-square, do your stuff." T-square pranced over to a desk, took
out some paper and a pen and promptly drew a circle, a square, and a
triangle. Everyone agreed that was pretty smart. But the accountant said his
cat could do better. He called his cat and said, "Spread-Sheet, do your
stuff." Spread-Sheet went out into the kitchen and returned with a dozen
cookies. He divided them into 4 equal piles of 3 cookies each. Everyone
agreed that was good. But the Chemist said his cat could do better. He
called his cat and said, "Measure, do your stuff." Measure got up, walked
over to the fridge, took out a quart of milk, got a 10 ounce glass from the
cupboard and poured exactly 8 oz of milk without spilling a drop. Everyone
agreed that was good. Then the three men turned to the State worker and
said, "What can your cat do?" The State worker called to his cat and
said,"Coffee Break, do your stuff." Coffee Break jumped to his feet, ate the
cookies, drank the milk, peed on the paper, sexually assaulted the other
three cats, claimed he injured his back while doing so, filed a grievance
report for unsafe working conditions, put in for workers compensation and
went home for the rest of the day on sick leave.